We seek a happy life and want to spend it with those we love. You want to know how to choose a life partner, and it only makes sense that your heart wants someone to share everything with. You cannot go "my mother told me to pick you" in such moments. Choosing a life partner is serious if you want to grow and live happily together. When two people love each other, they’re willing to fight life’s problems as one. Here’s how you should go about choosing the right life partner.

How to Choose Life Partner


Attraction Is Law

Sex and lust are as important as romance and cuddling. You need to find someone you are attracted to, not just in the lovey-dovey sense but physically as well. You are not going to be one of those boring couples who rarely look at each other. Sex is a powerful way to spice up a bond, and you can go all out with a life partner whom you trust and want to please.


Fear Is Foolish

The fear of being alone has driven so many people to settle for the first person who comes along. Not only is this a heartbreak scenario of disastrous proportions, but both of you will suffer. From anxiety to confusion, a fear-based decision on how to choose a life partner can result in continuous regrets. This in itself is a horrible way to live, and even the little happiness you have will be sapped. Choose fearlessly, and take your time with it.


Bin the List

If you’ve read somewhere that you need to maintain a list of good and bad qualities you want in a life partner, think again. People change and grow. A partner with that quality today will grow into a new one later. You do too, when you think about it; nobody remains the same. Love keeps you aware of pattern changes as you both grow and change together. Throw that list out because it’s pointless when it comes to learning how to choose a life partner. Paper is inferior to emotions. You need to feel them, not compare them against a written checklist.


Get out There

You need to put yourself out there if you want to find the one. You need to work right, exercise better, socialize more, take life one step at a time, and be glad when doing it all. The energies will build and spread until they resonate off the energies your life partner gives off. Then the magic happens, and you get another step closer of understanding how to choose a life partner. 

Don’t be surprised if you spend more time seeking your partner out than you did for a job. This is your soul, your life, and this person will define everything for you.


Be Yourself

There is no need for you to force yourself to be someone you’re not just to find your life partner. It beats the whole purpose. You two have to spend the rest life time together, so it's vital be open and honest to each other, which helps make sure both of you feel comfortable in this relationship, can accept all the good and bad of the other person and gradually falls in love with each other.

But this doesn't mean you have to be completely yourself. Sometime you can bend the roles a little bit considering your partner's need because with love come some sweet burn and responsibility. For example, if you like Thai foods and your partner like Chinese foods, then eat Chinese foods for a change.


Change into a Better Person

In connection to the previous point on how to choose a life partner, although being yourself is vital, you have to make necessary changes, like be a proactive exerciser instead of a couch potato. You need to be a better you without sacrificing your personal hobbies and interests. In other words, don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater. Be smart, change yourself where needed, and enjoy being who you are. Less is often more.


Know Your Partner

Every one of us assumes that a great rapport, plenty of common interests, and a hot bedroom atmosphere means that person is our "happily ever after." Not necessarily. You need to know them for months, even a few years, before you can decide if they are willing to brave storms with you, not just enjoy rolling on soft meadows of bliss. People have multi-layered personalities. Get deeper into the soul of your life partner, and know them as much as you possibly can. Isn’t this part of the romance anyway?


Build a Foundation

The devil is in the details, and so is all the mischief and heartache it can muster. So believe in foundations not details. A relationship has to have basic ground rules that can hold it up for years and years. Small details make you nitpicky and have the potential of destroying any relationship.

Qualities like kindness, honesty, trust, empathy, understanding and sacrifice are the foundations to look for in finding a life partner. Exactly when you need your life partner to be those things or vice versa, this is when things turn rotten. 


Bring the Fun

A little humor and fun never hurt anyone. With your life partner, even the silliest moments will become memorable. Do simple lovey-dovey things that only you two understand. Take the time to make your partner laugh, let go, and be free. While difficulties do come in life, you need to value the ability to make each other smile. It’s not always about passion or brainstorming together, it’s also about becoming kids again.


Be Each Other's Friend

It’s not going to be easy. If it was, everyone would have their ideal life partner. 

  • Your life partner should make time for you only because they want to. 

  • They will certainly have their own family and friend circles but you should matter just as high in their heart. In fact, you should be one of their best friends. Being a life partner also means doing buddy-stuff together - friends with benefits, so to speak. 

  • Relationships are tested during arguments. When all is said and done, will you forgive each other? These extra miles make a bond even tighter.


Get Serious

As juxtaposed with that previous point on how to choose a life partner, it’s not all fun and games. 

  • They have to be reliable and should want to be there, through the good times and the bad. You mustn’t force the decision on your life partner. They need to act on their promises; actions speak louder. 

  • Not only should they get along with your family but your life partner should also tell you things as they are: no lies, no deceptions and no indirect words that could be misunderstood. 

Honesty and a desire to be there for you are two serious traits that any life partner should possess.


Plan Your Future

Being comfortable with each other takes more work than you might expect. 

  • You will come to a point when discussing the future becomes a priority. When entering the final stages of how to choose a life partner, ask yourself: Have you actually planned where you are going to be five years from now? Or is that notion up in the air? 

  • Whatever you say or do, including all those frustrating and annoying moments, you two should still like each other enough to feel miffed but treasure each other as always. 


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